Polygamy – How to Avoid Marrying More Than one Wife

It has been a long time I have been talking to the women, so I decided to give this valentine gift to our men in this article.  I am also directing this issue of polygamy to the men because they are the people mostly concerned with this menace.

What is polygamy – This is a practice or custom of marrying more than one wife at the same time.  The man who practices polygamy is a polygamist.  Many men go into polygamy either as a result of their religious belief, custom, by mistake or to show off their wealth.

Most European Countries forbid polygamy and offenders are charged with bigamy, while the practice is still acceptable in Africa and some Asian Countries.  In this case, the question in everyone’s mind will be, is the practice of polygamy right or wrong, is it legal or illegal?

My answer will be straight forward.  No one can authoritatively say if it is good or bad, legal or illegal because its practice has been discovered to be based either on religion, custom or a way of life and it will not be wise to condemn someone’s religion, custom or way of way.  While the modern Christians see it as a taboo, Islam permits it with a specific number of wives one can marry at a time.


In Africa before the colonial rule, some societies view having many children as wealth and consequently marry so many wives as they believe that the more children you have, the more powerful you become.

Nevertheless, while it is true that there are a good number of polygamists who control their families and some level of peace is maintained, experience has shown that there are more disadvantages than advantages in practicing polygamy and this is the main focus of this article.

The Bible even says that ‘you cannot serve two masters at the same time; you will either love one or hate the other’.  Intimate love is characterized with jealousy and self-interest and there is no level of pretense that can expunge that.  It should only be shared between two persons (a man and a woman).  It beats my imagination how some women cope with seeing their husband kissing and caressing another woman in their presence.  You need to experience the kind of trauma these women go through.

Polygamy has dealt a devastating blow to so many families making members of the same household who ought to love each other become enemies.  Some family compounds have turned into battle grounds where different children and their different mothers display their superiority.  In some other cases, the fathers die as a result of these unbearable situations.

Investigations have shown that 80% of men who end up marrying more than one wife do not do it intentionally.  There have been some circumstances that led to such decisions.  Some of these situations could have been avoidable if well informed.

These are some of the ways men can avoid marrying multiple wives.

*      Be Faithful to Your Wife:  Infidelity is the root of all polygamy.  As long as you engage yourself in extra marital affairs, one day you will definitely be ensnared to the extent that you will not have any other option than to marry a second wife.  Learn to love your wife enough so that you will not have any cause to look outside your home.

*      Avoid Getting Too Close to Other Women:  You may ask ‘how about those who you work with.  You will have good working relationship with them without doubt.  Apart from that taking it intimately for example, having launch or dinner together, going to ceremonies etc will absolutely lead to another thing.  If there is any woman you should have any intimacy with, that woman should be your wife if you are really sincere about not having multiple wives.  Being so close with someone especially the opposite sex will certainly develop the love between you and that person and no matter how strong you may think you are, a day will come when you will fall in love with that person and consequently end up marrying her.

*      Avoid Receiving Gifts From Women:  Women, especially those whose ages are no more on their sides dangle gifts, money in particular in the faces of gullible men, married or unmarried so as to get them to their side and possibly marry them.  Many men have been cowed into second marriages because of gifts or financial help they have received from women.  If you are not interested in any intimate relationship with a woman, do not take her money or expensive gifts because that may be the way she wants to get at you and you will not be smart enough to get away with it.

Wao, I hope you enjoyed this piece.  Continue to be good to your wife!